I need help with Donovan. I love the kid, and he is so sweet and fun, but I am getting so frustrated when it comes to clean up time. He whines and moves like a sloth when it is time to clean up toys. Lately, I have resorted to cleaning up toys by myself after the kids go to bed so I don't get frustrated and yell. What do I do? I want him to learn that it is important to clean up after yourself and take care of your things, but it is so frustrating trying to get him to do it!!! Anyone have any tricks?!?
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I am dealing with the same thing with Sarah. She gets so many things out during the day in every room of the house.
When it's time to clean up, if she hesitates or refuses, I tell her if I have clean it up, it goes in time-out (up in the closet for the next whole day). Then she's racing to beat me to clean stuff up. But I hate the fight.
So I am seriousy contemplating packing away half her toys/art stuff then rotating every month. Less stuff, less mess???
Several times when I've threatened to put toys in time out if I pick them up the kids just say, "Okay, I want those in time out. You can pick them up and we'll earn them back later." Grrr. That's supposed to work!
I've hidden toys in the garage and they don't even notice that they are missing. (I do like rotating bins of toys in and out so the toys seem new again.)
I try to make them clean up one mess before we make another, or before we paint/watch a show/eat dinner. But it's always a fight. Colin whines and says, "That's too hard," no matter what it is I ask him to do.
If I ask them to pick up a certain number of items, that usually helps. "Let's see who can pick up 10 things!" And then I say it again and again until it is all picked up. And usually the promise of getting to do something else afterward helps. And sometimes it backfires, like right now. I just had this exchange with Colin.
Me: Let's hurry and clean up the room so we have time to play with Daddy when he gets home.
Colin: I don't want to play with him.
Children. I tell you what. If you get any sage advice please let me know. Because I would rather yell then clean up the toys myself at this point...
D- we moved the girls into bug beds because they were climbing out all the time and Sabrina fell out once and I was worried about them getting hurt. I wasn't really ready for the transition, but the girls were, so that's why we did it. I can tell already that they won't be ready for potty training for a while yet though. I know that doesn't answer your question about Donavan (I'm not sure what to tell you about that) but I wanted to answer your question!
I didn't read the other comments so if this is a repeat, sorry, but we have the same problem with Damon. So, I set the timer and say you have until the timer goes off to get things cleaned up, whatever is left the "toy monster" (me :)) is going to get. I have a big storage container that I keep in my bedroom with all the toy monster toys.
Then throughout the week, they have to do extra chores (they always have to clean their own toys and unload the dishwasher) to earn money or rewards. The money can be spent at the toy sale the toy monster has each Saturday morning or saved for real money--I keep track by just sticking magnets on a white board on my fridge. If they don't earn enough money to buy the toys back in a couple weeks I start throwing things away because obviously they don't really like that toy. I love it when the toy monster gets most of the toys on a Monday, then they have to wait all week...and they have fewer toys to clean up all week and it usually gets done. And if I keep seeing the same toy, I make it more and more expensive each time. So far we've only had two really huge sales. And, if I'm not in the mood for cleaning up, I just say no TV, no friends, no computer until the toys are cleaned up. If they want to play with them great. If it doesn't get done before bedtime, no extra stories, and they miss out on any "rewards" they earned from extra chores (like staying up 10 minutes late, or mom or dad telling a story in bed, etc)
Good Luck
Oh yeah, when I hear the timer go off, I grab my bin and come down saying " Fee Fie Fo Fum, I'm the hungry toy monster, here I come" and they usually pick up more toys in the ten seconds it takes for me to get down there, than the 10 minutes they had to clean up. And they think it's hilarious when the toy monster is disappointed and has to go upstairs hungry.
And the "extra chores" are things like changing a load of laundry, using a toothbrush to wipe baseboards (my personal favorite, it's usually just one room though), I'll have them wipe down walls and doors, and they can even do the bathroom sinks and tubs now. And usually it's about .25 per chore, but sometimes they get lucky and I have a few .50 and 1.00 magnets in there that they can draw out at random. If you want to call I can explain it more. :)
The Toy Monster totally backfired tonight. I guess I scared my kids and they just cried and cried and didn't clean up.
Okay, so I know this is a way old post but just was looking through your blog & haven't looked for awhile... So MaKenna is the same way. I have to get really created. Here's what works most often: I set the time and we have that much time to hurry and clean up, if don't make it she starts to lose privileges. If makes it she gets an extra something before bed. Amazingly, she comes back in sometimes begging for more time and excited for it. Also we play the backwards game. We put our clothes on backwards and then have to do everything backwards, ending with picking up all the toys. We also have a one set of toys out at our house rule, if want something else have to put others away first. And when nothing else is working I start taking away her clothes, the ones she's wearing. Tell her if its too hard to pick up a small toy then it must be too hard to wear that shirt, or pants. Hates it but only works if your kid hates being naked. So may not work for you :)
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